Song Mood: My Bloody Valentine - The Thing I Miss
*sighs* Err... I'm not quite well tonight. Err... don't ask, sides, I don't want to talk much about it.
Honestly, I don't know if this 'sickness' is caused by my own unstable emotion (but constant doubt) on him and also me xD. To be honest, even though it's almost 4 weeks old (and yeah, it means almost a month) I'm pretty much doubting myself. I keep asking myself, "is this what I really want?". Well, for some people 4 weeks is relatively new and still vulnerable for a relationship (especially a long distance, online, and lust-based like mine). Somehow, I know that 4 weeks, even though it's new and still vulnerable but it should be a firm base for both of us to know whether we should take this one for real or not. But then... as we move on, well... even our first week has put me in real sense that he loved me and he cared about me... :s
I feel really bad since I often get the thought to say goodbye to him. I often got the thought that this relationship won't last long and somehow not my cup of tea. The strangest thing is that I always return to him. I don't think I'm that ebil to break his heart xD
For you, yes... I <3 you *blushes*
Let's play on 09:18 p.m.
*sighs*
It's Wednesday, May 7th 2008
Song Mood: Alanis Morissette - Head Over Feet
Current stats update
> Currently, I'm in a relationship *sighs* No need to comment this one, well... just 11 more days and I'll survive the first month after almost 4 years stay single :3
> Yes, I think I'm in love. Weird? yeah, sure it is... well, I'm not sure about the 'love' thing though xD
> I'm happy with him, another strange yet not that much strange though. :3 He's a snobbish arrogant bastard, and I like him so... <3 (yeah... it's all about personality, like hell I'd care about physic though, well... but most of my insecurities were caused by my own physical problems xD)
> Humm... what else? even though, just casually but he hinted on marriage twice already! (first was when we're talking about pets and he said "the only pets I can take is dogs, if you can't then it means no pets then..." and second one when we're talking about his favorite foods. Well, I don't eat pork, and when I told him about this he said "when we marry, even though you're not eating pork, you'll still cook pork for me, right?" and again... got me dumbfounded, looked at my mobile phone with o.O kind of expression. Marry? me? Marriage? Me!!!?? O.o ROFL. Well, without any bad means, I don't think marriage is suited me... xD Well, my first thought was 'what? he already planned that far?' and then 'LOL, someone want to marry me? ROFL'
Hey, it's all about me and him? xD LOL... this is my first entry after a while, and I can't stop talking about him xD (so yeah... I guess I'm a bit head over feet with him).
Marriage isn't an option for me since our different faith. T_T yeah, I know, bad thing, but... *sighs* Nah... I won't talk about this... it depresses me *sighs*
Let's play on 1.43 PM
The Thing for now
It's Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Song Mood: Eric Clapton - Layla (Accoustic)
HUmm... nothing much actually... I'm just not feeling good recently... Yah that's all.. xD
Many people are asking me about my relationship status and I just said... "well.. we're all in a relationship, no?" XDDD
This is surely the most useless post I ever wrote xD
Let's play on 09:25 a.m.